Flexible Fun Unbound Bender The Bender is unique because it’s so flexible. You can shape it to fit your body for ideal external stimulation. It’s waterproof, and while the vibrations aren’t as powerful as a wand-style vibrator, they’re buzzy enough to make an impact. It’s also super quiet, even at its highest setting. Best for vulvas and phalluses $72 AT URBAN OUTFITTERS $71 AT UNBOUND PHOTOGRAPH: LELO Slow Build Lelo Sila Upon first use, the Sila irked me. The gentle vibrations and soft suction were teasing, and not in a good way—or so I thought. I soldiered on, living the tough life of a product reviewer, and eventually I was blown away. The toy has eight quiet settings, and even the highest is markedly less intense than what you may be used to. That’s intentional. Sila offers a slow buildup with a big payoff. The wide mouth focuses more on surrounding erogenous zones than similar sex toys, leading to a deeper and longer-lasting orgasm. Use it with lube (or in the bath) for solo sex or during foreplay with a partner. The wait will be worthwhile.
Great for vulvas $130 AT AMAZON $127 AT LELO Smile Makers Poet PHOTOGRAPH: SMILE MAKERS Invest in Versatility Smile Makers Poet Suction Toy Every body is different, and everyone’s preferences are different. Unlike most other suction toys, the Poet can customize one step farther. Usually, a suction toy’s opening is static. However, the Poet comes with three interchangeable mouths, so it’s easy to find the perfect fit. Changing the size of the opening can also affect the stimulation it provides. A bigger opening offers a more diffuse, slightly weaker air pulse, while the smaller mouths intensify the stimulation quite a bit. On top of that, the Poet features adjustable intensity levels and stimulation patterns. It’s also waterproof, which makes it a killer all-around bedside-table-companion. Great for vulvas and clitoral stimulation $129 AT SMILE MAKERS Most Popular
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sex toy PHOTOGRAPH: SATISFYER Best For Two Satisfyer Curvy 3+ Satisfyer’s Curvy lineup has been a personal favorite for a while, but the latest iteration, the Curvy 3+, is one of the best toys I’ve tested. It’s a dual-use vibrator and air-pulse stimulator. The air-pulse end provides steady, slow, but powerful suction, while the other end is where you’ll feel the vibrations most acutely. They’re pretty low-intensity even at the highest settings, which can be a good thing. It’s best to use this toy with a partner, with a person enjoying each end. Good for the clitoris, frenulum, and external play $40 AT AMAZON $65 AT SATISFYER Lelo Enigma PHOTOGRAPH: LELO
Double the Fun Lelo Enigma Vibrator & Air Pulse Toy Lelo’s Enigma is a weird toy. It looks like a ship from Star Trek, or a curvy sculpture you’d see in a museum gift shop. Like the Rabbit vibrator before it, the Enigma is designed to stimulate both the clitoris and the G-spot. But instead of relying solely on vibration, the Enigma’s clitoral stimulation arm contains a powerful air pulse mechanism for providing suction that imitates the sensation of receiving oral sex. The bigger, rounder end of the toy is where the vibration motor lives. Its body is flexible enough that you can use just one end or the other at a time, but if you use them together, it’s an intense experience. Even going slow, the Enigma fires you off into space at warp speed—in a good way. That said, the vibration end is a bit thick at its widest point, so if you’re not comfortable with large diameter toys, take it slow and easy. Use lots of lube. Best for G-spot and clitoral stimulation $200 AT AMAZON $160 AT LELO PHOTOGRAPH: DAME Flying Solo
Dame Arc G-Spot Vibrator All of the devices on this list can be used with one or more partners, but the Arc from Dame is designed for—and excels at—solo use. It’s a waterproof G-spot vibrator with five vibration patterns and five intensity levels, and it has a soft, semi-flexible silicone body with a squishy silicone tip. The Arc’s gentle curvature is angled so you can easily reach your most sensitive parts with just one hand, and all the buttons are right within reach. The curvature and broad, squishy tip also make it really easy to hit the G-spot. Those factors make it fun to use, no matter what genitals you have. Excellent G-spot stimulation, and broad tip works well on other erogenous zones $115 AT AMAZON $115 AT DAME Most Popular GEAR The 12 Best Electric Bikes for Every Kind of Ride ADRIENNE SO
lubricantGEAR The Best Laptop Backpacks for Work (and Life) MEDEA GIORDANO GEAR The Best Fitness Trackers and Watches for Everyone ADRIENNE SO Sony Xperia 1 IV phones GEAR Sony’s Xperia 1 IV Is a Nice Android Phone With an Absurd Price ADAM SPEIGHT Sex toy PHOTOGRAPH: TENGA Twistable Fun
Tenga Flex This affordable, unobtrusive sleeve has a discreet footprint—there are no obvious oversize fleshlight designs or silicone genitals to deal with. The spiral aesthetic is functional, too; the outer casing is flexible, allowing you to twist it to create an additional sensation. The soft, textured internal sleeve has varying intensity, suction, and noise levels, depending on the amount of lube used and how much you cover the air hole at the top. After solo sex, simply remove, invert, and clean the internal sleeve. The case cap doubles as a drying rack. Great for phallic stimulation $35 AT AMAZON $39 AT TENGA Image may contain Oars PHOTOGRAPH: UNBOUND For Backdoor Beginners Unbound Nudge Anal play can be intimidating. The Romp is ridiculously affordable and just the right size for beginners—it’s not too big but not too small. The curved base keeps the toy firmly in place without being uncomfortable. The medical-grade silicone exterior is easy to clean, too. Just be absolutely sure to pair it with water-based lube. (We have other recommendations below, but Unbound’s Jelly is another good option.) $25 AT URBAN OUTFITTERS $25 AT UNBOUND PHOTOGRAPH: LELO Motion-Sensing Fun
Lelo Hugo Prostate Vibrator + Remote Control The Hugo, from Swedish sex tech company Lelo, is a remote-controlled prostate vibrator. If you don’t have a prostate, it still works great, packing two powerful motors with six vibration modes and 12 intensity levels. It’s waterproof, and it comes with a very interesting feature: motion sensitivity. When Hugo is in motion-sensing mode, simply tilting or moving the remote control can lower or increase the intensity of the vibration. That makes it a lot of fun to use with partners but also really great for solo use. If you’re new to anal toys, its moderate size is not intimidating. While the packaging and product materials use gendered language, the toy itself is excellent for all genders. Good for P-spot stimulation $164 AT AMAZON $181 AT LELO Most Popular
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PHOTOGRAPH: MAUDE Best Lube Maude Shine Organic Water-Based Lube Maude makes a lot of great products, but the one that stands above the rest for me is its Shine Organic Lube. It's a simple, unscented, water-based lube that stays slick and slippery without becoming sticky the way some water-based lubes can. It can also be easily rehydrated with a little saliva, so you can get a lot of mileage out of a really small amount. $25 AT SEPHORA $25 AT MAUDE PHOTOGRAPH: COCONU A Spa-Quality Lube Coconu Water-Based Lubricant Most water-based lubes these days are made using aloe vera gel. They provide a very effective viscous slipperiness, but they can leave your fingers feeling sticky afterward. If you're looking for a cleaner finish or are allergic to aloe, Coconu's coconut-water-based lube is a good alternative. It's every bit as slippery-slidey as aloe-based lubes, but it leaves your skin a bit less tacky after use, and a bit more moisturized. Plus, it comes in an adorable little bottle that makes it look like an expensive spa-grade hand lotion.
$27 AT AMAZON $25 AT COCONU Image may contain Cosmetics PHOTOGRAPH: ROSEBUD WOMAN Skin Care With a Secret Rosebud Woman Honor Lubricating Balm Rosebud Woman’s sexual wellness lineup is luxurious. It treats sexuality with reverence instead of scorn, feeling more like worship and less like a catcall. The language the company uses on its products is very gendered (not all women have vulvas, and not all people with vulvas are women), but the Honor everyday balm might be my (Louryn) favorite lube of all time. The consistency is magical. It’s thick, balmy, and melts down to an oil with your body heat, providing intimate lubrication while softening and moisturizing the skin. It makes sense: We rub lotions and creams all over the rest of our body to keep our skin healthy. Why wouldn’t we do the same for more intimate areas? You can use the balm for lubrication, as a moisturizer, and for postpartum massage. Honor Balm also doesn’t immediately melt, so you get a few seconds to target the application. Nobody likes dealing with slippery lube bottles in the heat of the moment. $90 AT ROSEBUD WOMAN Most Popular GEAR The 12 Best Electric Bikes for Every Kind of Ride ADRIENNE SO
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Fifty ShadesShopping Tips If you’re new to sex toys, shopping for your first one can be intimidating. There are a lot of not-so-great and flat-out-bad sex toys. Ask Yourself Questions How do you like to be touched? What kind of experience are you looking for? Are you interested in trying something new? Do you want something for internal or external use? One of our favorite resources is Wild Flower. It’s both a sex shop and a sex toy manufacturer. The site has a robust series of educational articles and a great Q&A section. You can even ask the company questions via Instagram. You should also check out Oh Joy Sex Toy, a fantastic webcomic by artist Erika Moen. It’s an excellent resource for toy reviews and all kinds of sexual education content. Take a Trip to a Store (or YouTube) Once you have some idea of what you want to try, you should try to find a local (gender-inclusive) sex shop and see if they have the toy you’re curious about. The feel, the texture, the weight, how the vibration feels—these are things that really benefit from some hands-on time. Of course, that’s not always an option, especially during a pandemic. YouTube has a lot of hands-on videos. It’s not as good as feeling the toy yourself, but it’s the closest you can get without leaving your home. Good luck! With the use of sex toys being less taboo than ever before, people of all ages and genders are discovering new ways to feel pleasure in the bedroom. But despite the surge in the sex toy market (with sexual wellness searches up by 123% across the globe last year), purchasing your first toy as a beginner can feel somewhat intimidating. Don't know your bullets from your g-spot stimulators? Don't panic. We asked Laura Wood, Sales Executive and Expert at So Divine to give us her top tips for sex toy newbies, as well as her top picks for beginners.
Which type of toy is best for a beginner? If you’re new to the world of sex toys then choosing a toy can seem pretty daunting. Sex toys offer a whole variety of different sensations and there’s plenty to choose from depending on what you are looking for! See below for some of our top toys we would recommend for beginners. Bullet Vibrators Bullet vibrators are perfect for any sex toy newbie. They’re discreet, easy-to-use and make a gentle intro for newcomers. They can be used to stimulate all of your erogenous zones using the tapered tip. Our Afternoon Delight bullet is a great choice for beginner looking to purchase their first toy.
Dildos Penetrative toys such as a dildos are another great choice for beginners. You won’t have to worry about fiddling with any buttons and they are super-straight forward to use. When choosing your first dildo we would recommend check the length and girth first. Like all sex toys, it’s good to build up the size slowly. A dildo with a suction cup is also a good idea so can you enjoy a hands-free play. The So Divine Glorious dildo is a great contender for this! Cock rings Cock rings are another great go-to toy for beginners and are fun to use with your partner during sex. They can keep penis owners harder for longer by restricting blood flow ensuring a harder, longer-lasting erection. If you choose a vibrating cock ring such as our Thriller 2in1 ring you can both enjoy pleasure at the same time. Butt Plugs Butt Plugs are a great option for beginners and those who are wanting to explore some booty play. They can also be used by any gender! The So Divine Sweet Sensation plug is ideal for beginners. It’s small and petite, tapered for easy insertion and has a flared base. Flared bases are super important when looking to try a butt plug for the first time so you can ensure nothing gets lost!
Do I need to use lube with sex toys? Lube is a secret weapon that can be used by everyone and can be quite often forgotten about. It’s a bedroom essential! A little dab of lube can make stimulation much more comfortable during your solo sessions or with a partner. If you’ve not already tried using lube whilst masturbating then we highly recommend trying it. We would recommend using a water-based lubricant to start off with! Which sexual wellness products are essential for a beginner’s starter kit? An ideal starter kit for beginners would include a mix of clitoral and penetrative toys. A bullet vibrator, a classic dildo and a water-based lubricant would be a great choice. This allows you to explore a variety of sensations so you can learn what you like. Lubricants are also a game changer and can bring new sensations to play. Should I opt for a g-spot device or a clitoral stimulator? Choosing the right toy can depend on which sensations you enjoy or are looking to explore. G-spot vibrators are great for exploring your internal pleasure spot, whilst clitoral stimulators are ideal for clitoral stimulation. If your goal is to orgasm, then a clitoral stimulator may be a good choice as the majority of vulva owners need clitoral stimulation to reach climax.
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